I seem to be in the process of letting my hair return to its natural state. It wasn’t an intentional thing, and it isn’t without misgivings that I go down this path.
My hair is a dark blonde color – I found the photographs from 17 years ago to prove it. When I was a child it was lighter because of all the time I spent outdoors. Somewhere in the last 17 years I began to color my hair. First a few highlights, then a little more, then one day I was a redhead! Four years later I got the red out and began to be a “real” blonde. Every six to eight weeks, touching up the roots so that the increasingly dark roots and gray wouldn’t show. Over the years, damage happened and possibly a sensitivity to the chemicals. My hair fell out every time I colored – enough that it started to worry me. Women my age have enough trouble keeping their hair without bad reactions to hair dye.
I’ve experimented with less chemical-intensive concoctions but none are really satisfactory. So I have stopped. I haven’t put anything on my hair since late last year. I had it cut to my shoulders from halfway down my back a couple of weeks ago to get rid of the lightest, most damaged lengths.
I think I like it. Not so much the hair color, or the gray (I admit that I really liked that shade of light blonde!) but the process of beginning to look more like my real self. Stepping off the treadmill of faking it and onto the path of acknowledging and accepting who I really am today. Not giving up but hopefully walking a path to a healthier self-image and a more balanced approach to the rest of my life.
I’ll keep you posted.